lame posting

I am soooo glad it is a 3 day weekend and I have nothing that I have to do, or go or whatever! I love these weekends. I'm hanging out with my friends and my man and going to dink around the city (one of my favorite things to do). This blog thing is kind of fun I have to say. I thought blogs were really dorky, but then again I thought myspace was dumb and then I became addicted for awhile. There are so many random things I want to do in this city. Ride the duck for instance. The dorky bus/boat thing that goes around the city and points out the interesting things, they give you a duck bill shaped whistle that sounds like a duck. I also want to do the underground tour and the museum. I've never even been to the library down town, isn't that lame of me? It is fun to have someone to do that stuff with now, not that I didn't before but you know how it is...I thought about starting to take a pic a day like this one chick that has a blog. I dont know is that lame to copy someone else's idea? I mean we dont live on the same coast even so it is totally different stuff. I probably wont do one a day because I'm lazy about uploading my pictures. Anyways I gotta run and get ready for a night out with some chicks. I'm tired and not in the mood, but I gotta do it. If I had my way I'd lay in bed an watch the Al Gore documentary. :)

Some beautiful places

There are so many places that I want to go! I wish traveling wasn't so expensive or I'd go much more.

Some old poetry for ya.

Precious

This little man inside his house
Cries when he's alone.
He screams in agony and dispare
he begs God to show some care.
His frail frame shakes from the core
His wrinkled veiny fists clenched tight
waterfalls from his aging face
into puddles of past disgrace.
No ones coming he knows, no one knows his throbbing
The bottle is there to help him out.
though it consumes him
It hides him from those to tend
Those who want to be there, not pretending
The liquid consumes him, bitters his mind
Bitters his words
This little man is aching, Tormented by weakness
It kills him slowly-cutting off kin.
No one can stay to help, to understand
The enslaving blend consumes until it has the biggest prize of all,
Him.

Rape

Penetrating your unwanted being
Into my corpse
My timid voice is quieted
By your command
I look into your characterless black eyes
And see nothing
I am nothing

Falling

Torn away from comfortable
Spinning uncontrollably to the ground
An icy wind catches me in between
Saturating me with pain
Soaking wet with it
Waiting to dry out
But the pain keeps striking me
I'm on the ground already
Stop weighing me down
I'm already wet
I'll disintegrate with anymore
I long for the comfort of the sky
Of where i came from
Before i started to fall
I am drenched with heartache
though soon I'll dry out
and show no signs of being
wrinkled from the rain.

Youth

There is so much time, yet never enough;

Everything is tumb'ling on top of me;

I don't understand why it's all so tough,
All i want to do is scream and flee.
I am drowning in my own self doubt,
Though I feel something inside pullin' me high
I can almost breathe, i can almost shout;
I can almost think i see the sky.
I feel I am trying to save a part,
There's a struggle, when I'm near the break,
There is something, aggressing my heart,
I can breathe now, and i face the wake,
Youth is harrowing, though i stand bold,
I feel cold as i stand at the threshold.

First one, August 27th 2008

So you know I'm a journaler and thought that this would be a cool way to store some things. Plus my mom set it up for me so it made it kind of easy otherwise I'd still be writing everything down with pen on paper.

I really haven't done much in the way of art for the last few years but I've recently started to work on more, so periodically when I do a new piece I'll put it up here.

I like to paint, I want to start working on a series of smaller canvas acrylic paintings of landscapes. Some of them are places I've been and some are just make believe. I also want to work on my "card series" that I've been planning since I was a child, I do some comic type pen drawings and have always wanted to do something with them even on a small scale.

I'm just going to use this as a random assortment of creative things and whatever crosses my mind, of course it will be censored since it isn't just for my private usage in my hard copied journal but this can serve a different purpose. Which is cool.